universal_charm | The Empty Space Inside My Head [ Action / Voice ]

[ He woke up to an empty bed, which in and of itself wasn't unusual. Spock got up earlier than him most days, but there was something different about it today. The bed wasn't warm, wasn't the sort of muffled from being made up so as not to wake him. He sat up and stared at the empty space, because if he stared long enough that wrongness would go away, wouldn't it? Instinctively he reached out as Spock had taught him... and felt nothing. It was his own head, his own space, his own feelings and nothing of that quiet pressure in the back of his head. It was gone and he was alone in his head, and despite himself he felt his eyes burning as he tried to keep staring and make it not true.

Eventually he noticed the PADD on the bedside, and he reached for it, turning it on and curling in on himself as he read it through misty eyes. He hadn't felt like this since Pike died, since he had lost someone so important in his life that it left a super nova inside his head, in the little universe he had constructed to show Spock when they meditated. This was why he didn't do relationships, why he didn't get close to anyone, why he knew it had to be a bad idea, and damn Spock for this and the Malnosso and all of it-!

Eventually he got himself out of bed, the immediate sadness giving way to anger - at everything, anyone. An anger he could use to keep himself moving like he had before. He dressed himself and went to the Battle Dome, claiming a room and locking it before he started up the sims. He knew, in the back of his mind, he knew that this wasn't going to make him feel better in the long run or make this not real or make him wake up from what had to be a long, terrible, cruel dream. It didn't matter though. He understood this - the lashing of fists, punching, kicking, kneeing, rolling and dodging. Understood the burn of his muscles and his lungs, the drip of sweat down his face and the sting of pain. He understood that, could function with that like he always had and let himself drift in the haze of reaction and anger. He drifted until it pulled him under and he collapsed, soaked in sweat and trembling, gasping for air.

When he had enough of himself back he grabbed the stupid little journal and opened it, keying it to voice only. He didn't want people to actually see him like this. ]

[ Audio ]

[ There's several moments of panting - and not the pervy kind, the kind that said someone was bone tired, utterly exhausted, and possibly emotionally distressed - or scared. ]

Spock's gone home.

[ Another pause, while he debated what else to say, but what was there? The transmission ended. ]

[ /End Audio ]

[ He tossed the journal aside and pushed himself back to his feet, wobbling for a minute and then shook his head and keyed up the sim again. What he wouldn't give to have a serial murderer super soldier to go after this time. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So cranky about books. What might it do to offend you?

[And he's heading over there now, with the books.]

Spend two pages describing how they butter toast or something. You butter the toast and you're done. It's a sentence, not two pages.

_{[ He's still complaining, because that to was easier than thinking about the emptiness inside his head. It was a release for the anger too, just in word vomit rather than punching. ]}

Oh, we are a literary critic now, I see.

Though I shall admit, I once attempted... what is his name. Stephen King. I found him tiresome for precisely that reason.

[Knock knock, darling. Advantages of being able to teleport.]

I'm infamously hard to please, didn't you know?

_{[ The words lack his usual charm and bright wit. They're acidic,
bitter.}

He glared at the door when he heard the knocking, not wanting to move, to tired. ]

I know you can let yourself in, so do it.

[My we are being morose aren't we. He doesn't bother with the door, simply walks through the wall, but then stops on the other side.]

I don't recall you being so difficult as Alon that... [Smirk.]

That said, you'd best stir your pathetic bones and come greet me like a proper host, or I'm going to blow a path through your furniture. I'm in no mood to go fumbling about.

[That whole being blind and not having memorized the layout of Jim's house thing. Sure, he has his cane, but making the man move is probably a good idea.]

You still without your eyesight? Someone has a hard on for making life difficult for you.

_{[ But he got up all the same and made his way over to Loki, taking his
hand and guiding him around the furniture to the couch. If he was upset at
the walking through the wall bit, he didn't say, but he was probably used
enough by ow to Loki's tricks it wasn't much of a bother. His people could
teleport, so walking through walls - what was the big deal? ]}

I'll get some cups. There's a table in front of you, so watch your knees.

Another few weeks before I can crawl to John on bended knee and hope he doesn't play favorites.

[Shrug. At least he knows it will be temporary.

He produces his cane from thin air so he can tap around and get the full dimensions of the table, then sits.]

Was this table here before or have you been playing interior decorator?

[Loki has no doubt Jim had engaged in transporter shenanigans before.]

Do your hair up nice, put on a bit of gloss - sure he'll do you a solid.

_{[ He gets down two glasses and brings them over, sitting down beside
Loki on the couch to pour. ]}

We've always had a table. You just never come over.

I'd best wear my tightest trousers. They show off my bottom nicely.

That must be because my house is nicer.

Probably not a bad idea. Have all the bases covered, you know.

_{[ He smacked the other's shoulder sharply and flopped down onto the
couch beside him. ]}

That's only because you have magic, which is cheating.

Have all the bottoms nicely covered, you mean.

[He pokes Jim back, then leans against him.]

I think 'tis actually because I have a... girlfriend.

Rogue, you mean?

_{[ A sip, a pause that thankfully wasn't to awkward. ]}

How's that going by the way? I mean you guys are still together, I take it.

No, I've gone teasing through the female population of this place when you weren't looking and ruined them for every other man.

[Pfft.]

It goes well. She has been away recently, which I like not.

I knew you were up to something particularly wicked. Well, good thing I like it both ways right?

Why did we suddenly switch to talking like your brother? You're not drunk yet are you?

I'm always doing something particularly wicked.

[He snorts.] You know, I think my lady is more troubled when I flirt with men than when I flirt with ladies. It's curious.

[... He always talks like this. What. Fine. Suddenly, like flipping a switch he has a flat American accent with a hint of Brooklyn to it:] You trying to say I talk funny?

Not your accent.

_{[ He rolled his eyes. ]}

The pattern. Thor talks like that. Or maybe you always did and I never thought about it much.

_{[ He shrugged and took another sip. It was easier to think about this
than anything else right now. ]}

I speak the way I have always spoken. Like a civilized being with more than half a brain. So I would guess you've not been paying attention.

Or a guy who found Shakespeare late in life and sadly thinks that's what it takes to impress the ladies.

The Empty Space Inside My Head [ Action / Voice ]

Re: [Voice]

Re: [Voice]

Re: [Voice]->[Action]

Action

Re: Action

Re: Action

Re: Action

Re: Action

Action

Re: Action

Action

Re: Action

Action

Re: Action

Action

Re: Action

Action

Re: Action