[Would he? is Shiro's first thought. Jim is right, Adam was (ugh, past) a good person - a great one. They broke up over differences and not over lack of love and liking each other. Adam had other priorities and was worried about Shiro's health... would he have been ok with Shiro fighting for the rest of the universe?
He didn't want Shiro to die. And Shiro died anyway. Time to sip more beer...]
Yeah, well.. now I'll never know. He's gone, and I never got to say sorry over our last fight.
[ Leaving so much unsaid. Feeling like you never made it up to them,
like you never proved you were the person they knew you could be. He
chucked back the rest of his and called for another, going stronger this
time - a whiskey. But he would keep it to that. ]
But I think - I think we say our apologies, even after they're gone, by
living our lives the best we can. By doing the best we can.
[Shiro sticks to his beer, but that's enough. He can keep asking for refills for his pint glass after all. Kirk talks with wisdom, with the kind of words he would use himself with his team. And yet...]
These news don't exactly make me feel like I've done the best I can, Jim.
No, I don’t suppose it would. It would make me feel that way too. And
that’s okay. I think it’s natural, especially for men like us to feel that.
But Shiro - it really isn’t all your fault. And it took me awhile to accept
this, but, it’s egotistical to even think that it is.
I know you, Shiro. And I know that you did the best you could. You wouldn’t
give it anything other than a hundred and ten percent. And it - it hurts so
much when that’s not enough. But the reality is sometimes it’s not. But
even then, we keep giving a hundred and ten. Because that’s who we are, and
what we do, and what the people around us deserve. Because the next time
that hundred and ten might just be enough.
[ He chokes a little bit himself, but his words are gentle and
impassioned at the same time. He feels them, down in his soul. For as many
times as it didn’t work out, they managed to pull off the impossible. More
often than not, really. But reality wasn’t always a happy ending, and that
cut deep. But you had to keep going, always, no matter how much it hurt.
]
[With each word, Shiro's fingers shake more and more, so does his body, and he has to put the glass down to cover his face with his human as tears start to fall. He's a quiet, calm crier, but it's still shocking to see - because this is the man that usually carries himself with confidence and leadership, now breaking down and showing it on his body language. The vulnerability is real.
Is it too much to ask the universe not to hate him?]
[ Kirk set his drink down and reached out, wrapping his arm around
Shiro’s shoulders. He doesn’t pull him into a hug, but if he wanted one it
was there. For now he offers the comfort of someone who understands, the
weight of a shoulder to lean on, and the permission and acceptance to let
the grief out. To, for a moment, not have to be the pillar, and just be a
man. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
universal_charm) wrote2024-04-11 06:26 pm
no subject
He didn't want Shiro to die. And Shiro died anyway. Time to sip more beer...]
Yeah, well.. now I'll never know. He's gone, and I never got to say sorry over our last fight.
no subject
I know how that feels.
[ Leaving so much unsaid. Feeling like you never made it up to them, like you never proved you were the person they knew you could be. He chucked back the rest of his and called for another, going stronger this time - a whiskey. But he would keep it to that. ]
But I think - I think we say our apologies, even after they're gone, by living our lives the best we can. By doing the best we can.
no subject
These news don't exactly make me feel like I've done the best I can, Jim.
no subject
No, I don’t suppose it would. It would make me feel that way too. And that’s okay. I think it’s natural, especially for men like us to feel that.
But Shiro - it really isn’t all your fault. And it took me awhile to accept this, but, it’s egotistical to even think that it is.
I know you, Shiro. And I know that you did the best you could. You wouldn’t give it anything other than a hundred and ten percent. And it - it hurts so much when that’s not enough. But the reality is sometimes it’s not. But even then, we keep giving a hundred and ten. Because that’s who we are, and what we do, and what the people around us deserve. Because the next time that hundred and ten might just be enough.
[ He chokes a little bit himself, but his words are gentle and impassioned at the same time. He feels them, down in his soul. For as many times as it didn’t work out, they managed to pull off the impossible. More often than not, really. But reality wasn’t always a happy ending, and that cut deep. But you had to keep going, always, no matter how much it hurt. ]
no subject
Is it too much to ask the universe not to hate him?]
no subject
[ Kirk set his drink down and reached out, wrapping his arm around Shiro’s shoulders. He doesn’t pull him into a hug, but if he wanted one it was there. For now he offers the comfort of someone who understands, the weight of a shoulder to lean on, and the permission and acceptance to let the grief out. To, for a moment, not have to be the pillar, and just be a man. ]