They could never hide from each other during a meld, and perhaps that was partially why Spock had opened himself up so willingly before. That night in the hospital room, any time during Kirk's recovery thereafter. There was no need to say what they felt as it was almost always there between them, within a simple gesture.

It was something he intentionally avoided now.

"I will not disown you." He would alleviate that fear outright. "But. We should not be together, either. Not like that. You are my Captain, that will not change..."

There it was again, that crack in his voice right at the end. Just like with Jedao. He makes a sharp frustrated exhale through his nostrils, and stands suddenly. For all the spacious room provided, the cabin felt too stifling and small.

He did not want to pace, he wanted to leave, he wanted to remain, why couldn't things be simple? Spock looks over at Kirk, and he sees a clear glass door between them, locked. It hurts now as much as it did then. Only difference is when he felt the wetness in his eyes as before, the tear did not fall.

"I have been, and always shall be, your friend, Jim."